** Incoming Rant**
Apparently I have been designated Captain Fix-It by most everyone I know. No, they are not asking me to fix things (or not exclusively), they are asking me to fix people/relationships/feelings. Whenever someone has a problem, they call me, and like a schmuck i go where ever they are and try to help. I can partially attribute this to the fact that I ignored a call one day and i found out later that the friend who called had killed himself. But I apparently have to drop everything, not have a life of my own and just fix everyone else. And when I need something, when my life gets hard and I need someone, no one is available to talk to, they all have better things to do than be a friend and just fucking listen and talk to me about whatever is going on. The more this is happening, the more I am thinking about breaking a few old promises and start drinking heavily again. I know it doesn’t remove the issues. But when I was drunk all the time, I just didn’t give a shit about them and that is looking better and better.
Personally, I have stresses from work, medical stuff, I’m missing the most amazing woman that I have known, family issues. On top of that, I have 3 friends that I have to keep talking in from the ledge, 4 in abusive/toxic relationships (who refuse to leave and just complain about their situation) and countless others who are throwing stresses beyond count onto my back. I’ve been near the breaking point for the last 3 months and there is no end in sight. And almost no one seems to care that I am near that breaking point. I’m writing this while staring down 2 bottles: Jack Daniels and 151.
(I’m finally going to start using this for what I always intended it to be)
I have had terrible luck with relationships, most of them have ended badly. And the vast majority of my ex’s have not left me alone. Just had a Fun encounter with one of them today.
**Just a little background on this ex**
Her name is Kathryn, we went out over 5 years ago, for about 18 months. Things had been going well, we were talking about taking the next step and marriage. I had the ring made, called in favors and made reservations and all to make the night fancy and romantic. I come home a little earlier than I told her I would be, and I walked in on her with another guy, having sex in the living room of our apartment. She doesn’t stop riding the guy and looks at me and says “I think we should see other people”. It took everything I had in me to walk out of the door and not do something stupid. About a year after this, she starts calling me up and wanting to talk and make up and go back to how things were (which would never have happened). I agree to meet up with her, so we can talk (I went with the intention of getting a free meal and then telling her to screw off). As soon as I sat down she said “I’m sorry, they were a mistake”. My response was “Peace, bitch. I never want to hear from you again”. Apparently that has been code for her and her people to randomly just phone blast me and try to convince me to take her back.
** And now to the Story**
When I got out of work, and walked out to my car, I notice a small package on the driver’s seat of my car. Door was still locked and no damage, so either someone picked the lock or made a copy of my key (not sure which is a scarier thought). I opened the package and it was a disposable cell phone and a note saying to call speed dial 1. The note was not hand written, it was printed out to look like it was made of cut out magazine headlines. I called the number, and it turned out to be Kathryn. She was talking like the last 5 years never happened (the day that it ended was 2/23/2008), I called her out that I didn’t want to hear from her again, asking how she got in my car and why she is still not leaving me alone after so long. I was throwing out that I was about to file harassment/stalking charges on her. Telling her to stay out of my life. Stop trying to reach out to the woman I am seeing now. Stop trying to mess things up. She started throwing out new allegations about what she is/has done. I hung up. I get home to find the rest of what she was trying to say to me printed out nailed to my door. I burn it and go inside. Then for the next 2 hours, my cell and home phones are ringing off the hook with her and her people trying to convince me to take her back and pretend that things never went bad. Thankfully the phones have finally stopped ringing. I am drafting my statement, and will be going to the police to see what can be done to stop this.
‘Knights Of Badassdom’ [TRAILER]
LARPing, Peter Dinklage, Summer Glau, and Dani Pudi. You officially have no reason not to want to see this.
This looks awesome.
So we opened the portal to Hell today